This past week has been a RoLLeRcOasTeR, not unlike the one James & Richey Manic are riding in this photo. @ times like these, I try to remember that whatever happens is meant to happen. I really like what Dvorahji (aka “The Shut Up Guru”. She's called that bc she claims SHUT UP is "an ancient mantra for complete happiness" :) has to say on the matter. Some excerpts from the Q&A on her website.
Q: How come I'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time?
A: The only thing that's in the wrong place at the wrong time is your thinking. It's impossible to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. I know you've heard all this nonsense about sabotaging yourself, not listening to yourself, not being intuitive enough etc., and yada, yada, yada...but it's ridiculous. I want you to know that What Is does not make mistakes. There are no slip-ups.
You are exactly where you could “ONLY BE.” So, please do not drive yourself crazy with this lament, “If only I wouldn't have been there, if only I wouldn't have done that.” Drop it!!! It could not have been different. Time to learn a different mantra and say, “If it could be different, it would be different!”
Q: I have no discipline, how will I ever get anywhere?
A: Have you ever heard the expression, “You are not the doer?” I actually think it's an unfortunate expression, because it's so confusing. It really doesn't make any sense at all. You do, after all, “appear” to be the doer, even though all the scriptures and saints say otherwise. Why even the Buddha said, “Events happen, deeds are done, but there is no individual doer thereof.”
Now, that's all very nice, but honestly it means nothing to most people, it's just a thought, another so-called “meaningful saying” to get hung up on. Why confuse yourself with all these theories? Just assume you're doing it all. However, know deeply with pure conviction that “if it could be different, it would be different!” And in fact, there is NOTHING you could have done about it! Period.
Now this thought, although like all the other thoughts floating around in your mind, will give you peace. Because now you are free to stop lamenting what you can't do, or didn't do, and start living in what's happening now. Now you have a chance at discipline and enjoying it while it lasts.
Q: How can things be “only as they can be?” What happened to free will?
A: Ahh, the “free will” question. You want to exercise your free will, so you can do what? Eat pizza, instead of eggs? Or perhaps marry Jane, instead of Gertrude? This free will is very important to you, isn't it? It's that one big thing that sets you apart from the ants and turkeys and gives you your identity. You certainly don't want to be identified with a turkey.
Well, darlings, good news again – although it appears that you have free will, and you desperately want to be smart and wise enough to have free will, and you've convinced yourself with all your intellectual and spiritual knowledge that you have free will – you absolutely don't even have a smidgen of it!!!
You only “appear to be a big shaker and maker,” but in truth, it's shakin' and bakin' you. It can only be, as it is, in spite of all your so-called decisions and choices. But again, even though you may know with absolute conviction that you don't have free will, it's still smart to function as if you do. Otherwise, it's just too confusing and really doesn't make sense, because the appearance of free will and making choices is so strong.
So relax. What does it matter who has free will, as long as you accept your “apparent” choices and know with deep peace that, “If it could have been different, it would have been different.” Now you can go have fun, without constantly regretting your choices and boggling your mind with the concept of free will.
Q: According to many well-known New Age thinkers and healers, you're not in control of the events that happen to your life, but you're in control of how you deal with those events. That suggests a degree of control and free will. Could you comment on that?
A: Honestly, I don't know what they're talking about. It's sounds like goobly-goop to me, another theory to peddle to people so they can feel safe and in control. THAT which structured the events, also structured how you dealt with those events. You'll notice that when unexpected things happen to you, regardless of your spiritual or psychological training, you'll deal with things differently each time. Sometimes you handle things well and sometimes you don't. Either way, relax with the results of your attitude or actions. It is what it is. The events couldn't be different and your thinking and reactions couldn't be different. So forget all this third-rate psychological mind manipulation to feel safe and in control. In reality, you're already safe and the Big Kahuna is in control.
Q: I used to be so creative. I'm so dull now. What's happening?
A: Nothing. As usual. It's just a change, a simple second frame of the movie. Stop getting so hung up on every little change that takes place and blame yourself or something else for that change. It's the nature of life to change.
Sometimes you're creative and extraordinary, and sometimes you're not. Get used to the idea that everything is in flux and is always changing – even you. Tomorrow perhaps you'll be creative again. You don't have to run in desperation to the next seminar or healer on creativity. Relax. Everything comes full circle and happens in its own good time. Go to the beach, play with your children, watch “I Love Lucy”– but please, stop this constant yearning for the past. Be at peace with what's happening now.
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SoOoO comforting, I find. By the way, Dvorah is pals with Sri Sri Ravi Shankar aka Guruji. The dude who founded the organization behind those courses I’ve been taking. I did one last week & it was awesome, I had some really gr8 days.
A couple of years ago I had a dream of a roller coaster for fairies that had tulle & ribbons. However the other night I dreamt about a girl having a scorpion in her mouth. Possibly an allegory for what things have been like THIS week -__-
I hadn’t been remembering my dreams much lately until the past couple of days, although the other stuff I dreamt was pretty normal: Melik being the drummer in an all-girl band. Partying on a weeknight w/ Silvana @ a hotel Bauen-esque place & planning to get drinks that had eggnog & vodka - Ew…I’ve never had eggnog, but it seems ew. Plus vodka? Double ew. Chatting w/ Jeremy who was back in California. Planning what 2 wear 2 a meeting w/ Martin LBT, trying on different outfits. Seeing Ernestina Pais @ the supermarket.
Expression of the moment: "Elephant in the room" is an English idiom for an obvious truth that is being ignored or goes unaddressed. The idiomatic expression also applies to an obvious problem no one wants to discuss. It is based on the idea that an elephant in a room would be impossible to overlook; thus, people in the room who pretend the elephant is not there might be concerning themselves with relatively small and even irrelevant matters, compared to the looming big one. Source
